Amorphous, Androgynous
by abhorrent
Summary: How do you kill that which can be anything?


_Many, many ideas flowing through my cranium right now. So, here's a pilot._

_It's essentially a re-write of a previous story, except not at all. You'll see, if anyone even remembers me or my writings. If not, then enjoy this story-with-a-recycled-story-line-but-we-all-hope-has-original-potential._

_Ummm, a quick little briefing. This takes place before Light moves into that headquarters thingy. You know, when he still has his freedom? LOLOK. And, I took some artistic freedom with BB, because plot development. Yeah, but I guess it doesn't matter because this isn't canon LOL. Kk I'm done._

_Also, it feels good to write again._

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><p>He didn't know exactly why a sudden chill had raked its way up his spine, but it most certainly was an unwelcome jerk of his body. The brilliant detective, for many reasons, did not get "chills." He was above such childish superstitions.<p>

So, when sinister and rather overwhelming thoughts began to pour their selves into his rather brilliant mind, he tried—in vain—to ignore this quarrelsome feeling in the pit of his gut. Of course, his reign over these alien emotions came up empty-handed, when another chill wormed its way up his back.

This time, his companion noticed the slight movement, and now the great detective felt compelled to let out a string of expletives.

Of course, he did not.

He was above such lewd, disruptive, and reproachful acts.

Instead, he sighed, and banished his emotions to a far-off corner of his mind. He inclined his head towards his companion. "May I help you, Yagami-kun?"

The teenager looked, for what it's worth, like he'd been caught in the act of some lascivious behavior. He spluttered and shook his head, "No, no, Ryuuga. It's just, you seemed so troubled all of a sudden, I just wanted to make sure you were alright." Ah, the saccharine sweet and disgustingly dishonest response; if he wasn't a mass-murdering megalomaniac, L would recommend Light became an actor. He'd be a shoe in for any Oscar, Academy Award, or MTV moon-man he was nominated for.

Hell, he even fooled L sometimes. Keyword: sometimes.

Light was still staring at him; the genius then remembered he had a social etiquette he had to uphold, and felt compelled to respond with some sort of reassuring gesture, as all humans would do.

"My apologies if I worried you, Yagami-kun, I seem to have gotten a case of the 'chills.' I'm sure it's nothing." Yes, it was nothing. Just a muscle spasm.

Light looked skeptical, but remained partially silent, only responding with an even more disbelieving grunt. He picked up his pace as they neared the corner, seeming set on rushing to the café they had been patronizing off-and-on for a little over a week. L, of course, kept a similar pace to the one he'd been keeping for the entirety of their trip.

Why the other teen seemed flustered, or was even embarrassed, L hadn't the slightest idea. Was it that he had caught the other teen peeping? Or was it Kira, annoyed that L had refused to open up to him and elaborate any more than a few terse words and a dismissal?

L chose not to care, because indifference was a lot easier to manage than attempting to dissect every single movement the Yagami boy made. Yes, contrary to popular belief, the great detective did not waste all of his time nit-picking and researching extensively every movement and reaction the boy made. He was too busy a man for that. Instead, he was always only partially-conscious of the boy's movements, which allowed him to both ponder other necessities and pick up on expressions and actions that may be of use in his incrimination.

They neared their table—they had somewhat laid down an unsung claim on this area of the café—and the waitress teetered over to their table with a beaming grin. She had long ago dismissed her disturbance over L's idiosyncrasies, and had actually grown fond of the duo. While she still was a little apprehensive by the blandness in "Ryuuga Hideki's" tone, she could not help but be happy to see that her tolerance always landed her a more-than-generous tip.

"Good afternoon, Yagami-kun, Ruuga-kun," she chirped, bringing over hot tea for the former and a cup of coffee for the latter. "Here are your drinks, as per usual," she giggled, "Can I get you anything else?"

L tried his hardest to muster up a thankful smile. "Thank you, Shihoto-san, for your brilliant memory. You even remembered my sugars," and as if to make an example of his gratitude, he happily dropped four cubes into his drink, "And, if I may request, could I get a slice of strawberry shortcake? I must say, the baker has a knack for confectioneries."

The girl beamed, excited by the fact that she elicited a cordial response from the otherwise unapproachable-looking man. "I'll get that order right out to you, sir." With that, she bowed and took her leave.

Light watched her take her leave and turned a sly grin to his companion. "I think she likes you."

For once, L couldn't help but scoff. "Your calculations are incorrect, Yagami-kun. She's merely pleased that I had spoken more than four words to her this time around." He took a lazy sip from his beverage, and raked his eyes over the room, drinking in all of the inhabitant of this enclosed space. "It's a pleasant notion, though."

"I'm sure it is," Light cooed, a teasing smirk etching it's way onto his features.

"Four percent," L murmured, which elicited an indignant grunt from the accused. Light slapped a hand on the table.

"I did nothing to provoke any notion that I am Kira!"

"Kira would try to distract me with petty whims and unlikely circumstances, as a means of trying to induce some sense of hope in me. Then, when my endeavors are met with rejection, he would take much pleasure in watching me fall into a sense of despondence." He nodded at the waitress as she placed his treat on the table, "Feel free to refute my argument, however."

The teenager rolled his eyes. "Now, why would I waste time and energy when we both know nothing I could ever say would ever convince you." He turned his gaze back to the detective, "You really have given me more insight into the phrase 'actions speak louder than words,' Ryuuga."

"I suppose so."

And this is what it had become, L and Light's relationship. Wholly superficial, the only reason for their "friendly outings" was so L could try to dissect Light's brain, and visa-versa. No matter who was picking at who's brain, it all came up inconclusive.

L really hoped Soichiro would better himself at a faster rate. It was getting tiresome, with Light refusing to participate unless his father was in the best of health. This task was becoming more and more of an inconvenience by the day, seeing as he was then forced to make appearances at To-Oh University, and could not supervise his suspect behind the sanctity of his own headquarters.

They threw around lighthearted banter, both of them trying to find ulterior motives and subliminal messaging behind every word, until L was distracted by the shrill ring of his cellular device. Blinking a slow, languid blink, he precariously procured his phone from his pocket and gingerly held it up to his ear.

"Yes, Watari?"

"Hello, L," the man sounded a tad disturbed, the detective noted, "I have obtained some information that requires your attention."

At this, L's ears perked. "Does it have to do with the Kira case?"

"No," the man sighed, sounded more aged than he had ever before. "I'm afraid it does not. But, still, I would prefer it if you knew."

"Then, proceed."

"Of course. It has come to my attention that Beyond Birthday has eluded escape, and that he's been absent for quite some time now, actually."

L paused, mid-bite, but made no other move to show any sign of surprise or apprehension. "Is that so? Do you know the exact date of his departure?" He had to keep it cool; he was, after all, enjoying lunch with Kira.

"They told me it's been exactly three weeks and four days since they've last seen him."

"I see. I'll look into it, Watari."

"Of course, L."

With that, he clicked the phone shut with a litter more fervor than necessary, which did not go unnoticed by his companion, much to the genius' dismay. He fixed his companion a rather harsh stare and gave a slow chew to the food in his mouth. He swallowed, reveling in the sweetness of his confection, and gave a mental commendation to the baker who made this delectable treat. And thus began the awkward passage of time as the two sat in complete silence, each waiting for the other to strike up conversation. It would be an exaggeration to say that hours passed before either uttered a word, but to say, hypothetically, it felt as thought it were ages—well, that would not be so far-fetched.

It was Light who ceded in this battle, taking a rather large blow to the ego as he did so. "Ryuuga, what was with the phone call? You seem a little on-edge." Light knew his inquiries would raise his percentage of being Kira, but for some reason, this time he _really_ didn't care. The detective looked bothered, and if the detective was bothered this meant the self-proclaimed god could get him to slip-up, reveal himself.

Of course, his question was dismissed with a flick of the wrist. "Ah, that's nothing to concern yourself with, Yagami-kun. A bunch of this, and a bunch of that." He waved the waitress over and bit on the pad of his thumb. "Four and a half percent. You're really what they call 'nosy,' aren't you, Yagami-kun?" The waitress brought over their bill, and he gave her a nod.

Flabbergasted, the teen reeled back, "That's an allegation if I've ever heard one, Ryuuga. I'm not 'nosy'," he held up his hands in quotation marks as if to elaborate on this point, "I'm merely trying to be a good friend. I apologize for your ineptitude towards human compassion."

If L was bothered, Light didn't know, because the detective's blank stare never wavered. Instead, he only paid his bill and began to unravel himself from the seat, knees sliding below the table with amazing grace. His back, straightened for the moment, guided him from this table with such delicacy it always seemed to astound Light; after all, one would assume the lanky detective would be a klutz, from outward appearance alone.

Obviously, this was not the case.

"Well, shall we go?" The man shoved his hands in his pockets and turned to the other, head bowed and eyes shielded. "There's much to be done."

Light swallowed his saliva. "Yes, yes, let's go." He, too, held an air of grace as he stood from his seat, but his grace commanded a sense akin to royalty. His posture was strong, fearless, as though he challenged anyone to hold more class than he did at any given time. It was a stark contrast to the rather insecure stance of his friend.

With that, they wandered out of the building and parted ways, both not knowing they were wondering about the same exact thing, with the exception of one being less informed than the other.

All the while, they were not aware that the object of such abject thoughts had not only been enclosed in the same space as them, but had been stalking them for the latter part of a week, now. The man let out a low hum, something akin to a cackle, and stood from his seat.

"Yagami, Light," he tested the name on his tongue, grin spreading across his cheeks to mangle his face in a perverse and obtrusive gesture. He slapped down the appropriate change for his meal—which consisted of a jelly doughnut—and walked away. There was no need to make a scene at this particular moment, especially when his prey were so close he could taste them.

"Kira," he chortled as he exited the shop, making a beeline towards the teenager. He kept reasonable distance, before breaking off entirely from his tailing and running through a series of back yards and alleyways until he reached his destination: the Yagami household.

The Light to the teen's room had yet to be turned on, meaning the Yagami teen had yet to arrive home. Basking in the scent of opportunity, the deranged genius maneuvered up the side of the house, and with precision that rivaled that of any acrobatic performer, he shimmied his way into a window. With a quick tuck-and-roll, his entrance was close to silent. _Perfect._

He stood, brushing himself off, and took a moment to gain awareness of his surroundings. Taking in the immaculate surroundings, the man felt a mixture of disgust and respect wash over him. So, these were the dwellings of the teenager who sought to kill Beyond's toy.

"I almost want to laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of it." He said to no one in particular. He ran a finger along a bookshelf, rolling his eyes as he proved that this boy had borderline obsessive cleaning habits. "Light Yagami, killing L Lawliet. If only he could be so lucky."

He heard the door close from downstairs, along with the shout of "I'm home," as confirmation. The man withdrew a chuckle from his lips, guiding himself towards the closet as he moved to hide.

After all, he didn't want to spoil his surprise and make an appearance yet, he wanted to confirm something first. He was once, after all, L's "backup."

The teenager opened and closed the door with a quickness. A scowl quickly forming over his handsome features. He stormed over to his desk and sat with a huff, a wave of haughtiness permeating the room.

"Damn him."

The teenager began to perform some kind of project on his desk drawer, and Beyond leaned forward in interest. His eyes widened as a black notebook was pulled out of a secret compartment, before being placed in front of the boy. He then heard a cackle that could rival his own.

"If only you knew, L, if only you knew." The teen threw his head back and laughed, before slowly resigning himself to hiccups and giggles. "You will die, L, and I will make sure of it."

The thought seemed to relax the teenager, and he turned on the news and opened his notebook, taking the time to glance intermittently between the screen and this strange book. Beyond smiled to himself, slowly crawling from his hiding place and stretching to full length.

Silent, he weaved his way across the room, only to jump back in surprise when the Yagami boy turned towards him with alarm. Only then did he laugh at the horrified look that he was fixed.

"Ryuuga?"

"Yagami, Light."

"What are you doing in my room?"

Cornering the boy in his seat, the former serial killer trailed his fingers along Light's shoulders, before traveling up his neck, and along his jawline, before nesting themselves in Light's blatantly ajar mouth. He could tell that this disturbed the teenager to no end, and he took great pleasure in it.

"I've come to let you know what's mine and what isn't yours," the man purred, hooking his index finger and middle finger on the inside of the boy's mouth. In response, Light jerked forward in surprise, a yelp emitting itself from his throat.

"L is mine, do you understand?"

"Wha-nah!" Was the jumbled response, as Light attempted in vain to free himself. This irritated Beyond, and his response was to use his thumb to clamp down on the outside of the boy's cheek, hard enough to draw blood.

"I don't think I left any room in my statement for disagreement." He used his hand to drage the teen's head down in an uncomfortable manner. "If you don't, I have no qualms about killing a target before their intended expiration date."

Light's eyes flickered towards the other's, and he noted with a macabre fascination that this man possessed the Shinigami eyes. This equally parts excited and horrified him.

"Now," he cooed, using his other hand to turn the teen's head in another extremely uncomfortable angle, "I'm glad we have gotten that out of the way. In no way will L ever find out about this conversation, Yagami. If he does, I'll make sure that not only will you suffer, but you will live. And that's the worst thing that could happen to anyone after I'm through with them." He leaned forward and whispered something in the teen's ear, cackling as he did so.

And with that, Light's head was freed and the culprit escaped through the window without a second glance. Light wondered what the man's intentions were, but decided against rebelling against the man. He was obviously insane, insane enough to walk into Kira's own bedroom and threaten him with maiming. But, he could see the intelligence the shone through the hysteria.

Besides, the man's last words were what really shook the teen.

"I can see everything, hear everything, and be anything."

And Ryuuk just laughed.

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><p><em>I'm not really proud of this, but I'm not really proud of anything LOL. I just hope this is cohesive enough to elicit a response from anyone. I haven't written in a couple years, so I hope there aren't too many errors in this story.<em>

_Well, please, feel free to review. Tell me if you enjoyed it, if you would like to see more of it, and if you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know. _


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